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By Vivek Ranjan in Muzikk! - On

For a country that is obsessed with getting pregnant, finding out how to impress a chick and figuring out how to kiss, it is a shame that most people have problems getting laid before marriage. Unless of course they pay for it.

We believe that getting laid should never be a problem for a guy and he should have such tricks up his sleeve that chicks agree to sleep with him within a bunch of minutes.

Within a bunch of minutes? Yes, my friend, you have read right. Now we will tell you about few songs that when played to a specific type of girl, will most definitely get you laid. That too, by the time the song is over!

Pour Some Sugar On Me - Def Leppard

Type of girl - Diabetic
Time taken to get laid - 4 minutes

Pour some sugar on me has the right amount of cheesiness AND the right amount of suggestiveness.
Plus they use words like sugar and saccharine, extensively.

Right, question time! Tell me one thing that a diabetic girl will crave the most. Think. Think.

No? Sugar, man!

In the song, they just go on and on about sugar, saccharine, sugar lumps, sticky sweetness, etc. Guaranteed to turn on any person that crave sugar.

So, go ahead, do your thing.




Free Fallin’ - Tom Petty

Type of girl - Emo
Time taken to do the business - 3.5 minutes or so.

Why will this song turn on that emo chick, you ask?
Look at the lyrics.

She's a good girl, loves her mama
Loves Jesus and America too
She's a good girl, crazy 'bout Elvis
Loves horses and her boyfriend too

And I'm a bad boy, 'cause I don't even miss her
I'm a bad boy for breakin' her heart

And all the bad boys are standing in the shadows
All the good girls are home with broken hearts

I wanna glide down over Mulholland
I wanna write her name in the sky

That’s not all of it, but, it is most of it. Like 52.6% of the whole song. Do you notice a trend?

Basically, this song goes on about how brilliant and good the girl is. While the guy happens to be a total dickhead. And a “bad boy”.

Yes, apparently emo chicks lurrrv bad boys. *cheesy alert*

Plus, the song also mentions vampires.
Emo=Twilight Fan
Twilight Fan=Digs Vampires
Therefore, Emo=Digs Vampires.

Hence Proved.


Your Body Is A Wonderland - John Mayer

Type of girl - Insecure about her self/body.
Time taken to go gigitty gigitty - 4 minutes or so.

This song will most probably work on every other girl. It will most definitely work on fat females. But, do you really want to go there?

So yeah, this song mainly involves love making, using your hands while love making and praising the girls body. Basically, everything a chick is going to dig.

Just make sure that the girl does not end up with an image of John Mayer in her head. That will be a deal breaker!




If you don't believe us, your loss man. Just saying, all these have been tried and tested on multiple girls with a success rate of 70.8%


Vivek Ranjan

Reader! Before you go, I just want to say you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And you know what? So was I!

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