A slap is one of the most purest and unadulterated expressions of mankind. It builds up inside you, and just when you can’t take it anymore, it explodes out of you, making you feel so much better. Like a beautiful, glorious sneeze. Even the person who gets slapped feels an instant tension release, right before the humiliation. Your mind goes blank, there’s ringing in your ears and the world stops for a moment.

Also, The last line sounds like a cheesy pop song. If only it was about an orgasm and not a slap.

But let’s not digress. We as a nation have embraced the art of slapping like a homeless puppy. We love it, like a homeless puppy. We feed on it…like a homeless puppy?

Our moms have slapped the shit out of us. The teachers have been trying to literally mould us into a shape by slapping. A geometrical shape, apparently. Slaps have been such integral parts of our lives that we automatically cover our cheeks whenever we do wrong.
 

But even after such a rich slap history of our country, Mr Sharad Pawar forgot to cover his cheeks. He should’ve known he did wrong and a slap was forthcoming. On a balmy thursday, Harvinder Singh, a sikh transporter, channelled the nation’s frustration on the rising inflation and corruption in one perfect resounding slap and planted it right there on Union Agricultural Minister, Sharad Pawar’s supple cheek. The country gasped, right before it started laughing and tweeting. Havinder Singh for PM was the cry of the country. Politicians everywhere, protested against such a violent display of misplaced dissatisfaction, right after they peed a little in their pants of course. A ‘slap-gate’ had been opened. To everybody condoning it, that slap actually saved him. That slap like all other slaps, acted as the nation’s anger release. That’s the beauty of a slap. If it wasn’t a slap, it would’ve been a bullet, or worse, a shoe. Heh.

Speaking of shoes, Mr Pawar is not the first politician to be hit in public. George Bush was once hit by a shoe by a Iraqi journalist. But whatever he is, he’s a funny guy. He brushed the incident away by commenting on the shoe size. But sadly, when the slapgate occurred, Sharad Pawar supporters just didn’t have enough of a funny bone to brush it away. Trains were stopped, shops were closed, people were scared off the streets. 

What pushed him?

Sharad Pawar among other things, deals with the food. A sector where the common man wants to see the price drop, not rise. In an already starving country, price rise hits right where it hurts the most. Sharad Pawar however, no matter how badly the country’s doing, still remains to maintain his plush lifestyle. Now, we know he may not be the worst politician around, but he’s still one of the faces of the tyranny that is corruption. It’s something which the people have no control over. We can rally, protest, support a hundred Anna Hazares. But nothing eventually manages to hit the people in such high places.

Sizable Effect?

All Harvinder Singh’s managed to do is bring corruption in the news again, and of course, become a national hero. But in a couple of days, the hype will fizzle out, the tweets will lie forgotten, the funny videos will be replaced by videos of a baby Panda sneezing or Vidya Balan’s shaking that thing.
Therefore, a slap or two can hardly make a sizable dent in the system. But it sure can make us feel better about it. So, bring on the bazookas!